Category: Let's talk
Have you ever thought when you’ve been in a relationship, about having children? Have you and your partner actually discussed it? Or is it something that you would only think about when you actually felt ready to have a baby. This morning on tv they had a woman who only discovered after she was married, that her husband did not want children. It took a lot of councelling to get over it, but ultimately she chose her marriage over the desire to have a baby, and they are still together after 16 years. So, have you ever considered that a potential partner may not want to become a father/mother? If you yourself did not want children, would you admit it to any potential future partner before the relationship became too serious? Or is it something that you wouldn’t tell unless the subject came up.
because children are deffinetly on my ajender, I would have to make sure that my partner would be prepared to have them, if it transpired that he wasn't, then serious descisions would have to be made. and this would deffinetly be layed on the table if it looked like the relationship would become more serious. Also this is just my personal situation, because my eye condition has a high risk of beeing passed on to my children, it would have to come up for discussion as well. it is one thing for my partner to be willing to have kids with me, but entirely another to bring a child into the world who could potentially have cancer, and have to then face months if not years of treatment, and then live with what ever the consequences of that would be, as well as the added risk of secondary cancers. for me to not make my partner aware of this would ve extremely selfish. It is also because of these added risk, that IVF, fostering, or adoption would also be possebilities, so children for me is not something that would be taken lightly.
I've talked to my b/f about not having chilldren. I don't think I want them, and right now I know that I'm not ready for them. I think it's bvery important that you talk about this stuff before things get too serious. That way you both know what the other feels. I was luckey cuz my b/f felt the same way as I did, and we both sorta said we would see someday.
I was never a fan of small children baby- toddler stage but after Louis arrived and I held him everything changed ...Ardeth and I had discussed having children ..but I was worried about passing on my condition, and if I would be able to cope with a child..Alasdair was unplanned but he has put a huge smile on our faces, and if we hadn't taken the plunge I know, we would have spent our old age in deep regret.